A Mother for a Child, A Child for a Mother

“For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me (knitted me together) in my mother’s womb.”
(Psalm 139:13)

Maybe today has not been your banner day; maybe you find yourself quickly unraveling. Beyond any comprehensible reason, the tiniest member of your family will not be comforted. And, like rocks tumbling down a mountain, your four other children add their own catastrophes to your crumbling day. Your mind hurls insults, accusations, and questions faster than you can catch that flying sippy cup: “Maybe I am not cut out for this!” “Maybe I am completely inept at being a mom!” “Why can’t I fix all of their problems?” “Why can’t I answer all of their questions?” “Remember that mom with those 8 perfect children – why can’t I be more like her?” Before 10:00 AM, you have over thought every motherly instinct and goal. And through your I-haven’t-slept-63-consecutive-minutes-in-months-fog, you spiral into the dark night of mommyhood despair.

Every mother has been there; every mother is keenly aware of their own shortcomings and failures. But, dear hurting mom, there is one reality that will change your mental script forever, if you allow its truth to speak: God specifically created YOU to be your child’s mother.

Your personality, your mind, your smile, your instincts, your hands, your heart… all that ties together to describe YOU, is God-made, and God-purposed.  In addition, the child that you hold was intricately woven within your womb by God Himself. God chose that precious miracle of life to be gifted to you. God knitted you and your baby together at the moment of conception. Each of you were uniquely made for each other.

Let’s also pause for a moment to linger on another reality: if you hold in your arms an adopted child, God also has specifically made you and prepared you for each other. Consider a few standout examples of adoption in Scripture: Jesus, Esther, Moses, and Samuel. Each of these young ones were hand-picked by God to be raised by at least one, non-biological parent. Let’s return to Psalm 139:

“O Lord, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.” (Psalm 139:1–6)

God’s knowledge of us is perfect and complete. He knows why we do what we do; He knows our strengths and our weaknesses. He also wraps His presence around our paths, goes behind us and before us, and lays His steady hand upon us.  Because we know this about our God, we must also be convinced that each person that is placed under our care (whether biological or not) is determined by God Himself. And God has fitted your family together perfectly, from the very first day.

Dear one, God is in the midst of the dirty diapers and the grimy fingers, the toddler tears and the tantrums, the sleepless nights and the restless days. God made you with every capacity (through His help) to tend, guide, help, protect, nurture, and love the young people that call you mommy. God chose you for each other! And be assured that God enables every one of His creations to do the specific tasks for which they were made.

So, the next time you rock your colicky baby, dress your squirmy toddler, or pray with your struggling teenager, know that God made YOU for that child, for that moment. His wisdom and strength are abundant and available every second of every day. Call out to your Heavenly Father. He hears your cries, and He provides for your needs. Draw from the River of Life. Lean hard into His forgiveness. Renew your resolve to be the best mommy that you were meant to be, by God’s enabling strength. Praise your Father for the mystery of motherhood: a match made by God Himself! Then, together with the Psalmist your full heart will say:

“I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.” (Psalm 139:14)