“For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.” Romans 8:15

God is a Spirit. He is Jehovah. His name is Yahweh. This all-powerful, all-knowing, ever-present, eternal, sovereign, unchanging God of the universe controls each breath we take. He is so far above us that we could never hope to reach Him. Whether we admit it or not, we are all completely dependent on His mercy. Yet this God made a way for us to draw near through the blood of His Son on the cross (Colossians 1:20), and Yahweh has chosen to relate to us as “Abba” Father. This Aramaic term is one of the first words expressed by Jewish infants. “Abba”, similar to the title “Daddy”, expresses absolute trust and affectionate love towards the one who is called to nourish, protect, and sustain his children.

It is no wonder that the Enemy has sought to undermine this tender image of a father. The overarching premise of the feminist movement that began in the 1950’s was simply this: destroy men. They were very open about their hatred and disdain for any show of authentic masculinity. The message was, In order to elevate women, they needed to prove that men are not needed. Their strategy was to destroy manhood by promoting promiscuity, homosexuality, and abortion. According to Nancy Pearcey in her book The Toxic War on Masculinity,

“We are currently in what is termed “fourth-wave feminism”, but it isn’t a coherent movement. They argue that men and women are essentially the same. Today we see this war – this false ideology reaching its logical end – no distinctions.”

What does this mean? It means that all the distinctions are off. It means that there are older men, fathers, single men, and young boys who have been persuaded that their role in society is inconsequential. Richard Reeves in his article “Male Inequality” noted that,

“Deaths of despair (suicide, overdose, alcohol) along with serious sexual addiction are triple in the lives of men compared to women. Two words describe the reason for the despair in young men today; they feel worthless and useless.”

Many fathers and future fathers have no idea what it means to be a man. Even our churches have been negatively affected by the war of attrition against masculinity. But it would be inaccurate to represent only one of the extreme lies that Satan uses to undermine God’s design. The other side of the spectrum is one that we can be a bit more uncomfortable speaking openly about in evangelical circles. Perhaps this is because we do not want to make unfair generalizations or we are simply afraid to engage in a debate that is nuanced and complicated.

As Christian men, fathers, and leaders, we need to take a stand. Biblical manhood is not measured by our physical strength, personalities, hobbies, or outward appearance. A man who hunts or fishes is not more manly and therefore more godly than a man who does not. A man who uses his God given authority as an excuse to badger, berate, or abuse others is no man at all. He is a coward who has turned a sacred calling into a mockery. While the feminist movement has provided many men with the opportunity to run away from their God given identity, there is another growing movement in which toxic masculinity is promoted and paraded as a badge of honor.

Being a man isn’t about dominance or silence—it’s about servant leadership, strength under control, responsibility, and self-sacrificial love. Your God given identity is a precious and weighty gift. The enemy wants to convince you that you are dispensable and that you are not “cut out” for this. If that lie evades you, he will tempt you to turn this responsibility into an idol of the heart. He wants your role to become a position that you use to serve yourself instead of serving others.

Fathers and young men, perhaps you are currently unsure of who you are and who you were created to be. Maybe you are feeling useless or worthless. Take heart! Our culture does not get to define what it means to be a man, nor do they get to judge the value of a man. Manhood is not defined by our opinions, our experiences, our preferences, our upbringing, or our feelings. We must shift our gaze toward truth and absorb the biblical definition of manhood that transcends all cultures and social demographics. The only One who can fully define manhood and determine its value is our Creator.

“And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” Genesis 1:26–27

Fathers, it is of utmost urgency that we understand the intrinsic value of a man, strive to consistently grow in how we live out masculinity, and teach the next generation the vision of biblical manhood.

In light of Father’s Day, I have created a seven-day journey through the Scriptures to study this topic. This would be a great study for you to do as an individual, with your local church, or with a friend. I pray it will encourage, educate, and inspire you to become the man and father that God is calling you to be.