“Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.” Deuteronomy 6:4-9

The Bible is clear that God has expectations of those who nurture and impact the lives of children. Whether parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, Sunday school teacher, youth worker, etc., God expects you to employ Biblical principles in your teaching and patterning for the next generation.

Success as a parent (or in any other mentor role) is not about the product that your children turn out to be but about your obedience to Christ. Thus, you are a successful parent if you are purposeful in modeling Christlikeness to your children. To put it concisely and practically, consider the following goal:

A Consuming Love for God in a thoroughly Scriptural environment that actively disciples behaviors and attitudes with an eternal perspective in a temporary environment.

Practical Applications:

1. A Consuming Love for God…
A consuming love for God is where the parent must begin in order to accomplish an environment that is Biblical and disciples our children effectively for Christ. Examine your heart and life and whether you have a consuming love for God. This may mean you must remove distractions or idols, actively walking towards God and away from something else. Then, spend time memorizing Scripture, schedule alone time with God, and spend time with people who love God. Allow your love for God to leak out and flood your environment

2. In a thoroughly Scriptural environment…
Our goal is to help our kids interact with the environment and culture around us and know how to respond biblically. Examine your worldviews and interaction with the culture around you and evaluate them with your children. Then, on a consistent basis, highlight Scripture in action in their lives.

3. That actively disciples behaviors and attitudes…
Behavior speaks of action and obedience, while attitude speaks of internal respect and honor. Your children may look sweet from the outside, but you cannot see their heart. Make sure they know that you are equally concerned about their attitude as they are about their behavior. Effective discipleship here includes clarifying your expectations with clear, simple instructions (eg. “Brush your teeth now” vs “Brush your teeth”). Finally, remember to celebrate the spiritual victories in their lives!

4. With an eternal perspective…
Rather than getting stuck on a particular issue or disobedient action, help your children to understand the path they are on. For example, help them to see that getting into habits of irresponsibility as a child leads to habits of irresponsibility as a teenager and adult, bringing along consequences. Consider writing, with your children’s input, a family mission statement that helps shape and voice the eternal perspective in your home. Knowing what your family is working towards together will help each of you evaluate if each activity or attitude fits into that eternal perspective.

5. In a temporary environment…
Some aspects of our discipleship of our children are necessarily temporary; when they are in diapers we disciple them differently than when they have their driver’s license. Beyond these seasonal changes, we must remember that culture is always changing. Thus, we ought to be consistently watching and being alert to potential pitfalls within and without our homes and be prepared to deal with them biblically. Finally, we must acknowledge that our home is a temporary environment. Thus, we must be preparing our children for their future, setting goals, and training them to leave and serve outside of our homes.

May the Lord strengthen and guide you as you seek to be a purposeful parent!